Mum

My mum died yesterday.

She retired in July.  She toddled off to France, expecting to spend her whole summer there.  Unfortunately she was taken ill while there and told to return to the UK.  On her return, she was diagnosed with pleurisy.  While investigating this, they found malignant cancer cells.

She was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer on Monday 8th September.  I flew out to see her on Saturday 13th.  I got to spent 6 days with my mum.  She came out of the hospital on tuesday 16th September, for palliative care at home. She has had a great support network of friends and her husband, my step-dad, Lee looking after her. I was sad to leave her last wednesday, but happy that those around her would take good care of her.

Her sister flew out Monday to see her.  Her brothers were supposed to be flying out on friday.

Mums friend Marie called me yesterday to tell me the news.  It is very sad, but she died peacefully, holding Lee's hand, and being her usual cantankerous self to the end.

Words cannot describe how much I am going to miss her.

We told the boys yesterday afternoon, Oliver took it well, Seb doesn't understand.  Isaac got a little teary.  Their school has been awesome, they all said a prayer for Nanny this morning.

I am sitting here in tears writing this.  A date for the funeral has been set, and we are arranging our travel plans as we speak.

I expect the stages of grief to hit soon.  At the moment everything is numb, and this just feels like a big surreal experience.

One of mums friends has set up a memorial page on Facebook, you can find it here if you wish.

While mums away.....

I had to take an unexpected trip back to the UK last week.  My mum is not very well, but I will write more on that at a later date.

So it was daddy and the boys for 6 days.  I left them well prepared, with food in the freezer.  All those little organization things I do?  Well, they certainly came into their own! Paul was able to still go to work everyday, as the boys were in school or day care.

They took a trip to Monkey Joe's on Sunday.  They actually wanted to go to Frankie's Fun Park, but it was closed for a private party

Bubbly fun.....

Paul took them to Frankie's Fun Park after school on the Monday.  They had a blast!

Sebastian helping himself to a post-breakfast snack.....

And sand and water fun!  He should not be standing in that water table....

Would appear we have some good size snakes around us.  This skin was found down the side of the house.  We think (hope) it is a black rat snake. 

Before school chaos

Honestly, think they boys had a lot of fun with daddy!!!

The last week (a bit late…)

Last weekend we were lucky enough to go and see another baseball game.  My friend Tracey had reserved a suite, like a private box at the top of the stands.  It even had air conditioning, which was very nice in the intense heat.

We stayed for most of the game, and the kids had a good time.  They were all nice and tired, and Seb fell asleep on the way home.  Nothing like a late night over a long weekend.  

Sunday we went out for some ice cream, then to the pool, then a BBQ at home.  Nice and relaxing.

Monday was Labor Day so everyone was off work and school.  We decided to check out the Bacon Labor Day festival as Simpsonville City Park.  It was well advertised and looked like fun.  We got there about 12.30, and they had already run out of food.  The queues were stupidly long, and there was little mention of bacon anywhere.  They did however have a pretty good car show, always a winner with my boys.  All sorts of different cars, old, new, military.  There was also a stock car, which the boys had kittens over.  The owner was nice enough to let all 3 have a seat in the car.

                                     

                                     

They loved it, it was the highlight of their day.  We felt a little let down by the festival. It was billed as being awesome, and so was not.  Thank goodness for the car show.  We went up to Simpsonville and got some lunch, then headed to Home Depot.

In our last trip to Costco, I had bought a massive bag of floor.  I wanted a decent container to store it, and had an idea for a big bucket.  I found what I wanted.....

                              

Everyone went back to school and work on Tuesday.  Sebastian had his first lunch at school.  He did really well, and ate most of it.  He will now be having lunch there on a Monday and Tuesday.

This still gives us our afternoons together.  We have been to the pool, and caught up with friends.

                             

He is also still off all day on a Friday.  This week we went to Gravitopia for their kids under 6 jump.  This is $8 for an hour 9-10am.  There was only 5 kids and 5 adults.  Perfect.

                             

Then it was shopping at Walmart.  I spied a few presents for Christmas and Isaacs birthday.  Not long now!!!!

After lunch we headed into Greenville.  I wanted to check out the main library.  I was not disappointed.  Their kids section is massive, and although there is plenty for Sebs age, there is even more for kids Oliver and Isaacs age.

Seb loved playing with the castle and the people who went in it.

                              

It took him about 30 minutes to find the computers, which is unusual.  But there were so many other things to get his attention that he wasn't there for long.

                             

They have a play room at the back of the kids area which he also enjoyed.  It was the perfect way to kill an hour before we had to get the boys, particularly in the heat.  I will definetly take him back, and I intend to take the older 2 one weekend soon.  

He had such a good time, and was so please to get this book, that he fell asleep in he car holding it while in car pool for his brothers.

                             

Yesterday we checked out Trains, trains, trains at the Mauldin Cultural centre.  This is an exhibit of model trains that comes once a year.  The boys loved it, even better it was free, though we did make a donation.

We want for lunch at Chicora Alley in Mauldin.  Our friends the Withers recommended it.  We were the first there for lunch at 12, though there was someone drinking at the at the bar.

The server, Corey, was very good, attentive, and not too in your face.  We all went with soft drinks. The boys choose chicken tenders for Oliver and Seb.  We ordered a grilled cheese pitta for Isaac.  He was much dismayed about this, as he wanted normal bread, and boy did he make his feelings known.  Paul went with a burrito, while i opted for the Chicora burger. Sen decided to split his drinks cup, making a large mess, but the staff quickly cleaned it up and got him a new one. We did not have to wait too long for our food, we could even see the chefs in the kitchen. 

After all Isaacs moaning, he loved his pitta cheese sandwich, and the other w were sold on their tenders.  I had opted for sweet potato fries with my burger, and they were delicious.  Paul loved his burrito, especially the beans not being too processed inside.  Everything felt super fresh. 

There was clean plates from 3 out of 5.  The check came.  A pleasant surprise, one child eats free for every adult eating on a saturday.  This made it very reasonably priced.  Pretty sure we will be back at Chicora Alley sometime soon. 

First week back!

School did not come soon enough for me.....  Last Friday the boys had their hour induction.  Paul had taken the day off to look after Seb, which was awesome for all involved.

We dropped Isaac first and he went in really well. Then I dropped Oliver.  Again no problems.  I headed of to Chapel for the service, and got talking to a delightful German lady who had only been here 3 weeks.  Brought back some memories.....

                                 

I then headed to Isaac's classroom to pick him up, only for him to rebuff me and tell me to get Oliver first! So I did.  I then got talking to another German mum in Oliver's classroom, who also has a child in Isaac's class.  To make it even spookier:  her youngest went to Isaac's old school, but was in the other primary class, they have also just extended their contract, and I bought our Quinny buggy from her when we first got here.  Weird........

We got back home about 10.30, and decided to do something to celebrate the end of the holiday.  We jumped in the car after lunch and headed to Greenville.  

Someone's first morning really took it out of them.....

                                  

Some of my blogging friends and other local websites had mentioned that the Upcountry History Museum were running a special exhibit about medieval times, so we went to check it out.  Entry was less than $20 for all of us, and as it was a Friday afternoon and all the Greenville school were in session, we basically had the run of the place. 

                                   

The boys had great fun exploring all the hands on interactive exhibits.  They planted vegetables, cooked up a royal feast, dressed up and built castles and chairs.  Really good fun.

                                    

The rest of the museum seems really interesting, all about the history of Greenville. I would like to return one day sans kids and take my time to read it.

It has been so hot here, so we decided on the Saturday to go exploring. Paul had a car from work, so we jumped in and headed towards Stumphouse Tunnel, about 90 minutes form here.  It was much cooler in the woods, and in the tunnel in particular.  The tunnel was originally started in 1852 to connect Charleston to Knoxville, then eventually to Cincinnati.  Construction was halted due to the Civil War, then a lack of funds.  To read more on the history, click here

Isaac freaked a little bit, and refused to go in, but we dragged him.  We should really have brought a flash light, as the light on our iPhones wasn't quite adequate....

We also explored nearby Isaaquenna Falls, a short walk from the tunnel.  It was pretty over grown, so we couldn't see much.  Plus it was pretty high up, and with 3 chimps in tow, a little prequarious.  We headed towards home, stopping in an Outback restaurant for a late lunch on the way.

Then we drove into one of the worst thunderstorm I have encountered while being in a car.  The rain was coming in sideways, you could barely see in front of you as the window wipers were working full pelt.  It was so bad the boys couldn't hear their movie over the rain on the car.  We ended up pulling off the road to a petrol station and sheltering behind a building as rubbish bins rolled around the forecourt.  Scary stuff.

Monday came, and I walked Isaac in for the first day.  Here he is with his grade.  I love the way school gives them a bag for the kindergarten year.  Isaac's school calls it primer instead of kindergarten, don't ask me why.  Maybe they are 'priming' the kids ready for school....

I also walked him in for the second day, as Oliver had a follow up at the ENT department at the same time school started.  He was a little wobbly, but fine once one of the teacherscame and talked to him.  He seems to be really enjoying it and settling in.

Oliver's ear is healing well.  The doc said he is fine to do physical activity again this week, but he is still not allowed to get water near his ear.  He has another appointment in 2 weeks time to check the progress, then we take it from there

Here isaac is on Friday in his casual dress.  The shirt was provided by the school, as a kinda welcome gift.

As I said earlier, it has been really hot here.  Paul got this temperature as he sat waiting for the boys on Friday afternoon.  

We have hid in the house a lot, due to the temperature.  We did go to the pool of Friday afternoon, but it seems so unfair on Oliver having to sit on the side.  We have started allowing him to go up to his waist, but he has to be so careful to not get any water on his ear.  If Seb goes splashing near him, he knows he has to move away, and quickly!

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I am about a week behind on my blogging, so please bare with me.  Despite the fact the kids have gone back to school, I have about 3000 words to write for my final OU module.  My degree is slowly coming to the end, with only 2 short lever 1 10-point courses left to do.  This blog post has taken me 3 sittings to complete, as I don't have much time right now.  As well as the OU work, there are various school coffee mornings and doctors/diabetic/ENT/IRS appointments in the next few weeks, so apologies if things take a while!!!!

Thanks for your understanding!!!!!

Back to school

Have I mentioned recently how long the summer holidays have been, and how much I am looking forward to the boys going back to school???

Well the day is nearly upon us.  I tell you, 12 weeks is just too long for a summer holiday.  Since the stress of getting Isaac into Oliver's school has now passed, I have been doing my darnedest to get organized.

School uniform was ordered after we got back from holiday.  Isaac luckily didn't need much, as when we first ordered Oliver's when we got here, we ended up with duplicate orders (long story…).  So there has been uniform sitting in Isaacs closet, virtually unused.  Oliver only needed new shorts and new t-shirts.  I will not be buying beige bottoms for them again, they are a nightmare to keep clean, Isaac has some of Oliver's beige trousers, but they will both be in navy shorts to begin.  I can pick up the trousers from a store in the mall when they actually need them!

Isaac shares a closet with Sebastian, and there was just no where to hang his uniform.  So I commandeered one of the hall way closets upstairs for both their uniforms.  

                                   

The top shelf has bottoms, then t-shirts and jumpers hanging, then 2 boxes with their underwear in, as the both need plain socks for school, and neither have many of these!  Hopefully it will make getting dressed in the morning easier, and changed after school quicker.  We shall see….

As Isaac is now doing full days, I came up with a little lunch chart bellow.  Nothing special, just a table with their names and 5 boxes for what they want in their lunch boxes.  Then a section below.  I printed it, cut the food items out, laminated it, then stuck magnetic tape on the back so it sticks on the fridge.  This is to make my life easier when making their lunches, but also to help with Isaac's word recognition, to get him reading as soon as possible.

They even have somewhere to hang their bags and keep their shoes.  Last year, their shoes were just going in the generic shoe box by the door, and bags into the cupboard.  That cupboard is a bit too full now (I am hanging on to junk, now I have space to keep it!), so they have a peg each in the utility room, and a basket each for shoes and other important things they may need for school.  

                                       

I can put their lunches there, and they can pick them up in the morning.  Should work…..

Isaac met his teacher this morning, and got to see his classroom.  Considering he has been saying all week that he didn't want to go, he was brilliant.  He was polite, friendly and courteous.  I certainly took the good Isaac to school this morning. He really did me proud, and I think his teacher was quite taken with him.  We got to the drop in session at a good time, as Isaac had free run of the room, and his teacher was able to speak to him and me well.  I am so excited for him.  I really hope he enjoys it, I think he will.  His old school really set him up to succeed, and I think he will do so well in this school.  Cuteness alert:  For the first 3-4 weeks, the older pupils have to go and get their kindergarten siblings for car pool, make sure they have all their belongings and wait nicely with them for the car pool number.  Love it!! Oliver is going to take great pride in collecting Isaac, and Isaac will love seeing Oliver at the end of the day.  

Isaac even got to meet a couple of his class mates, and a kid he did baseball with last year is also starting in his grade, but in a different class.  Isaac has 13 in his class, including him.  Think it is the same across his grade, which means an intake of about 50.  Roll on tomorrow for their hour induction, then Monday for their first proper day….

Oliver is much better.  Still in a bit of pain, but able to run around and pretty much be back to his usual self.  I have been in contact with his new teacher regarding his ear, and she bass been very accommodating about him missing P.E and recess, and about positioning him in a good spot in the class so he can hear well.  I know he still has wadding in his ear, but his hearing seems worse again.  Hopefully this will improve with time.  I am looking forward to meeting his teacher tomorrow.  

Sebastian is also moving up a class.  This week they have been moving them slowly.  Monday he did an hour in his new classroom, tuesday was an hour and a half, and yesterday was 2 hours.  in fact, I picked him up from his new class room yesterday.  Interesting.  The girls in there seem very young, and it was quite chaotic, but I am hopping that improves with time.  He also goes to 4 morning from 3 next week.  I may change pick up time to nearer 12 to give him more time on class, and me more time to do work.

Having met his teacher tonight, they seem very nice.  All young, but well experienced.  After chatting with them, I feel very confident that Sebastian will be happy in that room.  Seeing as I was the only one to turned up to that session, I was able to get a feel for all of them, and I like how they say they handle things and what they are planning to do this year.  They are also really keen to support him with his speech which is great.

All in, I have had a great day today meeting Isaac and Sebastian's teacher.  I hope they are going to settle in well and enjoy school.

Here goes.....

Oliver's operation - round 2

So Oliver had to be at the hospital at 11.15 yesterday morning.  I stayed home with the other 2 and took them to Dollar Tree and for a McDonalds.  

Oliver was eventually taken in for surgery at 2pm.  Poor boy had not eaten since 9pm the previous evening.  Lucky for Paul, he had taken lunch with him.  We arranged to swap over at 3.30, as this should be half way through the operation.

We did the swap, and Paul took the boys home leaving me as the only person in the waiting area, along with the 2 receptionist.  I took my lap top so was able to do some Uni work.  About 5.45, one of the nurses from the recovery area came out, and asked me to come through, as it shouldn't be long.  

Oliver's doctor eventually appeared about 6.45.  Another epically long operation, over 4 hours.  Dr Alexander explained that when they opened him up, they had found a small amout of cholesteatoma hiding by the ear drum, in a place they could not see using the camera.  It was really small, like a couple of millimeters.  But the fact it had grown back made the doctor chose not to reconstruct the ear bones (it was a hard decision, apparently).  He worried that if he had reconstructed the ear bones using the titanium plates that the cholesteatoma would have come back again, leading to a much more complicated operation to remove.  It would basically involve removing the wall of the ear candle next to the mastoid bone, and would leave Oliver with a large ear cavity, and issues with water getting to the inner ear for the rest of his life.  Having since looked this up, it is not nice.  It has cosmetic and auditory implications forever.  In 60% of cases, after the first removal, cholesteatoma does grow back, but because it is being checked for, not to the same extent.

The doctor also fitted a tube from his ear canal to his nose cavity to enable fluid to drain more easily.  He found dried blood in the ear cavity from the last operation, which would not have helped the healing process.  He also took some cartridge from his ear and put it at the base of the ear canal for the prosthetic to be fitted to next time round

The doctor is confident he got it all this time.  Oliver has a follow up in 10 days time, and returns to school in 9.  He is not to do any P.E or recess for 2 weeks.  And no water in the ear till the follow up at least.  Again every one was really nice, we came away with 4 prescriptions. One anti-nausea, one antibiotic, one very strong pain killer and one for ear drops.  The ear drops begin in a few days time, everything else being administered now.

The nurses were interesting this time. 2 men, both skin heads, one lean, one not so lean.  They were keen to get him moving, unlike the ladies last time.  We were out in just over an hour.  And Oliver was not sick in the car.  He saved that one for when we got home.  

Last night was very unsettled.  Oliver slept on the sofa, then we moved his bed into our room (thank good ness for big houses).  He was sick a lot last night, and barely kept any water or medication down.  He had some toast to morning, and has been snacking ever since.  He is currently on the sofa where he has been most of the day.  He is in quite a bit of pain, despite the medication, so we are doing our best to keep him comfortable.  The next few days will be very lazy, but I managed to get the other 2 out today.

Isaac and I hit up a community yard sale near by.  We spent $12 and came away with a toys dragon, Jenga, 2 books, 3 car magazines, a Clemson baseball cap, and 2 sets of Melissa and Doug wooden toys.  A pretty good haul.  Then we went and checked out Simpsonville Farmers Market.  A lovely little market, where I picked up some spicy hot habanero chilli peppers for Paul.  Watch this space for what I do with them!

Sebastian went for a hair cut this afternoon.  She didn't do a great job, but I had a coupon so it only cost $10 with tip.  Makes a nice change from the fortune I normally spend on him at specialized children's salons.  

I will keep you posted with Oliver's progress as the week goes on.  Don't think there will be many photos on #yearofoliver for a few days......

End of Summer holidays….

Ok so technically its not…. The Greenville school system starts back next tuesday, and my boys have an hours induction on the friday, then 2 half days on the following Monday and Tuesday, before being in full time (till Labor day weekend, the first week in September).

But…. Oliver has his reconstructive surgery tomorrow.  You may remember back in February when he had the cholesteatoma in has right ear and had to have it removed during a tympanomastoidectomy. We have to be at the hospital for 11.15 tomorrow.  The doctors plan is to put him under, open the ear up through the same incision, and remove the plastic that is behind his ear currently.  His ear drum is starting to curve into his ear canal slightly, so the doctor may need to take some cartilage from his ear to stop it protruding any more.  As long as the cholesteatoma has not returned, three small titanium plates will be placed into his ear canal, to mimic the bones that had to be removed last time round.  Then it should be as simple as closing him up, and letting him come round.  

As horrible as all this is, we are very fortunate.  Dr Alexander is awesome, and I have every faith in the staff at the hospital.  I was able to request this particular date, as it means Oliver barely misses any school.  His follow up appointment is on the 2nd half day of school.  He won't even miss any recess.  When I explained my reasons for this particular week, Dr Alexander was very understanding.  He says he will probably just glue it this time, with no need for bandage strips.  Purely cosmetic, thinking of his return to school.  I just hope that 1) the doctor is running on schedule, 2) the cholesteatoma has not returned and 3) that Oliver doesn't feel as rotten the next day.  We will see…..

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This summer has felt incredibly long, and hard.  I was thinking about it, and comparing it to last year.  Last year we had Paul's parents visit at the beginning of June, Oliver did a week of camp, we went on holiday at the beginning of July, then my dad came in August.  This year we have had no-one!!!!  Yes, Oliver did camp again, and we went on holiday.  But our holiday was very active to say the least.  

I have struggled this year keeping the boys amused, but I think I have managed it ok.  What with the big holiday, money has been a little tight around here, so there have been no visits to soft play etc.  We have mainly been doing cheap/free things.  Because the boys completed their summer reading log with the library, they got free tickets to the baseball.  It was good fun, but very hot!!! 

We have done lots of park trips and getting together with friends.  I don't think the falafel with school has helped my positive attitude towards the holidays either.  But it is sorted, and I shall try and enjoy next week of doing very little with the boys.  I foresee lots of watching films and playing computer games.  

What has also made it hard is my OU work.  Although I made a big effort to get ahead before holiday, since then it has been tricky to dedicate myself, and find the motivation.  I have 7 weeks left, and in that time I have another assignment due 10th September, and an end of module assessment (EMA) due 2nd October.  The assignment I am not too worried about.  My EMA though….It is a website of up to 3000 words on a project of my choosing (I am about half way through in rough, gonna have to watch my word count!) , then review my webpage, then write a 2000 word report on a document the OU have chosen.  This is not easy.  I have been doing well to keep up with the work load, but will be glad when the boys return to school and I can fully knuckle down.  But in the long term, this is my last big OU course, almost like a dissertation module, I only have 2 more short course to do and I will have a BSc Open Degree (Hons) in Chemistry, Psychology and Environmental Studies.  There is light at the end of the tunnel…….

Will update again next week about how the operation goes, and the boys return to school...